From Comparison to Celebration
We’ve all been there. Whether it’s personal appearance, vocation, marital status or finances, we human beings can easily fall into the trap of comparison. We can compare ourselves with someone else either to feel good about ourselves or to feel worse. But the outcome of comparison is never positive!
Paul stated in 2 Corinthians 10: 12 that if we compare ourselves with one another we are “without understanding”.
In all honesty, comparison used to be a habit for me, a way of thinking that had embedded itself in my psyche. Once the Lord put His finger on it and highlighted it to me, I was quite shocked out how pervasive it was in my life. I knew I needed a new mindset, and praise God He was more than happy to help me in this area.
For me, comparison almost always made me feel worse about myself. I would often compare myself to someone else in ministry and feel like they were doing more than me, or better than me. I would then start to nurse sentiments of being insignificant and nonessential. What I failed to see was my own unique value, not based on my works but on my Father’s love for me. I couldn’t value what God had placed in my hands and what He had called me to do in that season because it didn’t look as impressive as someone else. There were even times I was angry at God for not giving me a certain role or position but having me behind the scenes doing what seemed to me, once again – insignificant. I was measuring successful and purposeful ministry not by His standards but by my own. Now, looking back, I praise God he didn’t put me in those roles or positions because it wasn’t right for me and probably would have been disastrous.
I want to highlight the 4 ways comparison is destructive and how to identify it’s workings in our lives.
Comparison Breeds Competition:
Measuring ourselves with someone else can stir up the desire to compete with them. This is just as true in the church as it is in the world. Because of our own insecurity about ourselves, we can easily fall into the snare of trying to prove ourselves. It’s sad when we look at our own brothers and sisters in Christ this way, but unfortunately it happens all too often. I recently heard a successful Christian business man being interviewed on a podcast. He said something that really stuck with me. “There’s more than enough room in the kingdom for everyone’s calling.”
Wow! What a powerful revelation. There’s more than enough room for your calling and mine. As a matter of fact when we come together in unity working for the common goal of God’s glory and kingdom, we can actually compliment each other’s gifts and callings. We need each other and were designed to work together not against each other.
Comparison Stirs up Envy:
I once had a dream that really brought awareness to this area.
In the dream I was watching someone I knew and loved, leading worship. She was on the keyboard and singing beautifully. Her worship was shifting the atmosphere and bringing breakthrough to others, yet in the dream I was consumed with envy. I couldn’t celebrate what was happening in the room and how God was using my friend because I was comparing her worship leading with mine. I believe God gave me this dream to show me that I had allowed this seed of comparison to take root in my heart. If I didn’t uproot it, then it would bear the fruit of envy and destroy my relationships. I asked God to forgive me for comparison and envy.
When we are envious of someone else’s influence we rob ourselves of the ability to celebrate how God is using them. I want to be able to rejoice whenever I see someone rocking it in the Spirit and not receive it as a threat to my significance.
Comparison Causes Division
Competition and envy can ultimately lead to division in the body of Christ if we are not careful. When we are competing with one another then we are no longer playing on the same team. A house divided against itself cannot stand.
Paul outlines the beauty of diversity in the body of Christ in 1 Corinthians 12:
“Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”
He goes on to describe the different functions of the body and our need for one another in order to fulfill the purpose of Christ.
Honoring each other’s functions as well as valuing our own, weeds out the comparison that leads to division. Developing a culture of honor helps guard our hearts against comparison. We can learn to honor the different functions of the body, not discounting or dismissing anyone as unnecessary or unimportant. We ALL have a role to play and when we recognize what our role is and embrace it with whole-heartedness we are less likely to compete or be envious of someone else.
Comparison Can Lead to Shame:
I was watching a leading evangelist share his testimony on a youtube video once. The video showed him on the streets, praying for people and leading them to Christ. People were getting healed and delivered with tears streaming down their faces. I was quite moved by the powerful testimonies, but there was also this nagging feeling I couldn’t quite identify.
From time to time when I would see this man’s videos pop up on my feed I would skip them…. Not because I didn’t like what he was doing but because that feeling would surface again. Later on, God helped me identify it- it was shame. The shame I felt from comparing myself to this evangelist and feeling like I was coming up short… way short. Shouldn’t I be out on the streets too, witnessing to others and praying for their healing? Guilt started to set in. What kind of Christian am I?
When I began to confront those feelings and ask for God’s perspective He showed me what my calling and destiny is. He spoke over me his delight in me as a mom, raising my children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. He reminded me of times I have prayed for strangers when I was out in public and I have shared the truth of His love to many. It didn’t look exactly like this evangelist and I certainly haven’t ministered to as many people as this man, but God is pleased with me, and He delights in my obedience to Him to step out when He’s called me to. And that leads me to this truth- God is only calling you to do what He is calling you to do. Make sense?
At this time in my life, I know my primary calling is not evangelism in the streets. That doesn’t mean that I will never evangelize or minister to people I meet, but I know that’s not my primary calling. I can rest in the knowledge that I’m walking out what God has asked me to do in this season, at this time. I don’t have to feel condemned because I’m not doing what someone else is, because I feel assured in what He’s called me to do. I can also watch those evangelistic videos rejoicing that many are coming to Christ through this man’s ministry. I can be challenged to step out of my comfort zone when God calls me to and inspired by the boldness of this evangelist. Yet I can do all of those things without feeling less about myself and walk in shame.
Ultimately, the key to overcoming comparison is understanding your worth and identity. When we see ourselves through God’s eyes and value ourselves the way He does, we will be less likely to fall into the trap of comparison. When I know who I am, I’m not easily threatened by who someone else is. I can actually celebrate who they are because I can see them the way God sees them too. God has gifted each of us uniquely and loves us unconditionally. He delights in us and he delights in the way he’s called us to function in the body. When we learn to receive this and embrace it, we can look at others with the same perspective. As brothers and sisters in Christ we must cease to become each other’s competition and instead become each other’s biggest cheerleaders. Let’s choose to champion one another in pursuing our God given destiny.
I sometimes still struggle with comparison, especially when scrolling through social media! But I’m learning to catch myself more often when I do. I have to remind myself the truth of my identity and my mission.
I have to remember that I can only be me. I can’t be someone else and they will never be me. God’s only made one of each of us and there’s no one else on the planet who can do what you can do, the way you do it. Might sound like an oversimplification but maybe we need a little more simple in our lives and less of the complicated. I encourage you to choose to celebrate who you are and the gifts he’s given you to fulfill your unique purpose. Celebration empowers us to see the beauty of God’s working in our lives as well as others, eliminating the spirit of competition and comparison.